The "arcs" here are somewhat shorter than in other series. If my goal is to get up to the Owls, then I'll just plow through these. Also, there are several backup features which I will review separately.
Following the introductory issue, Jonah Hex and Amadeus Arkham are settling down into a siege position. The conspiracy knows them, knows where to find them, and is no doubt coming after them. Arkham reads up on them and his research leads him to a legendary "Religion of Crime" and its "Crime Bible." Hex doesn't really care because there's at least a dozen heavily armed men surrounding the mansion.
What follows takes about three pages, and I can't even remotely describe it. It's just a total badass western gunfight. Absolutely everything you should expect from something like this. I think Jonah Hex got bonus points for shooting the lanterns the horseback riders carried. After the stage is over and he enters his initials in the high score, he interrogates the one survivor. Arkham was right, they're followers of the Dark Faith, and the prostitutes have been sacrifices to consecrate Gotham as their unholy city.
Cut to the inner circle of the Religion of Crime (seriously, can we get a better name here?). They have the chief of police tied up and are torturing him while nonchalantly discussing how they sent their men to kill Hex and Arkham. About half of them are assuming he's dead, the other half are a bit more genre savvy. Hex catches up to them in their actual torture chamber where they're inscribing Latin into the police chief, and he gets in a tussle with a huge thug. He looks like he's about to lose, when Arkham grabs a gun and shoots the thug in the head.
Hex recovers while Arkham is stunned,and starts to beat up the doctor. During which, he name drops the prostitute. Belle. Not very creative, but eh, at least she had a name. Wait, how did he learn it? Anyway, he beats up the doctor before receiving a prophecy that "in the future one will come with a smile and fists like unto stone , who strips flesh from bone, and who leadeth them of his kind that also serve Cain, and Gotham will bow before him." Joker? Darkseid? Who knows.
And...wow! that was quick. The very next panel is a newspaper showing that the entire criminal cartel has been busted up by the freed police chief. Granted, he knew who they all were, but still, that was fast. Oh, well, apparently though they got the leadership, that's nowhere near the end of it. They talk about building ARkham Asylum and Blackgate, and offer Hex a chance to join them and provide direction. He says no, and goes after the three guys he originally came here for before getting distracted.
HEx notices a suspicious wagon, and just barely manages to tackle Arkham to the floor before it starts firing a gatling gun. The other men at the table with them are killed. Hex takes out the men on the Gatling gun and pretty much decides to get out of town after he gets the Trapp brothers. He blows off Arkham, and goes after his original bounty. He finds them playing cards over kidnapped women. One of the women runs, and the Trapp brother shoots her. Hex is clearly angered by this, and is ready to at least dispense a little justice in Gotham.
This comic was doing very well until the very end there, but the same problems of issue one cropped up. The random kidnapping and murder of women at the end seems really out of place. Due to the truly awesome gunfight in the middle I would have given it more, but I have to drop it down to 3/5. If it doesn't improve some of its unfortunate implications, I may have to drop it even further.
El Diablo 1-2
This is the supporting story in issues 2 and 3 of All Star Western., and I only have one word: Lazy. Well, I could extend it with an adjective like "fucking" or I could repeat it a few times, but it doesn't even deserve that. It's just lazy. If I could put less emphasis on it, I would.
Here's the plot. Lazarus Long is El Diablo. When he goes unconscious, Zoro appears with the Balrog's whip. There have certainly been worse ideas for superheroes. Lazarus rides into town and finds it full of zombies. He's taken in by survivors, who have an Indian tied up who they're blaming for the zombies. The Indian tells them that only a demon can defeat the zombies, and since Lazarus can only turn into the demon when he's asleep, they knock him out. He then kills the zombies, and fights the spirit that summoned them. They reach a stalemate, and El Diablo retreats to Lazarus's body.
That's it. There really is nothing more to this. I can't tell you much about the characters except a few zombie apocalypse archetypes like "Asshole" and "useless guy." Zombies themselves are so overplayed at this point. They're just a generic placeholder enemy. A lot better critics than I have explained why zombies are so popular, but at this point, I'm just about over zombies. Give me a new take on them. This is not it.
The art is so lazy, I swear they traced a couple covers, particularly in the last panel of issue 1. It looks like it was drawn by a particularly talented middle-schooler at best. The inking is barely Silver Age quality. It's just...lazy. Filler. It's nothing worth noting. One of the worst sins of any medium to me is being *boring*. I'll take something stupid but fun over this drek. This gets my first 1/5. Don't even bother reading this part, stick to Jonah Hex.
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